How Cold Is It?
50 degrees outside
* New York tenants turn on the heat
* Minnesotans plant gardens
40 degrees outside
* Californians shiver uncontrollably
* Minnesotans sunbathe
35 degrees outside
* Italian cars don’t start
32 degrees outside
* Distilled water freezes
30 degrees outside
* You can see your breath
* You plan a vacation to Florida
* Politicians begin to worry about the homeless
* Minnesotans eat ice cream
25 degrees outside
* Californians weep pitiably
* Cat insists on sleeping on your bed with you
20 degrees outside
* Cleveland water freezes
* San Franciscans start thinking favorably of LA
* Green Bay Packers fans put on T-shirts
15 degrees outside
* You plan a vacation to CANCUN!!!!!
* Minnesotans go swimming
10 degrees outside
* Politicians begin to talk about the homeless
* Too cold to snow
* You need jumper cables to get the car going
0 degrees outside
* New York landlords turn on the heat
-5 degrees outside
* You can hear your breath
* You plan a vacation to Hawaii
-10 degrees outside
* American cars don’t start
* Too cold to skate
-15 degrees outside
* You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo
* Miamians cease to exist
* Minnesotans lick flagpoles
-20 degrees outside
* Cat insists on sleeping in your pajamas with you
* Politicians actually do something about the homeless
* People in Minnesota think about taking down screens
-25 degrees outside
* Too cold to kiss
* You need jumper cables to get the driver going
* Minnesota Twins head for spring training
-30 degrees outside
* You plan a two-week hot bath
* Minnesotans shovel snow off roof
-38 degrees outside
* Mercury freezes
* Too cold to think
* Minnesotans button top button
-40 degrees outside
* Californians disappear
* Car insists on sleeping in your bed with you
* Minnesotans put on sweaters
-50 degrees outside
* Congressional hot air freezes
* Alaskans close the bathroom window
* Green Bay Packers practice indoors
-60 degrees outside
* Walruses abandon Aleutians
* Minnesotans put gloves away, take out mittens
* Boy Scouts in Eau Claire, MN start Klondike Derby
-70 degrees outside
* Minneapolis residents replace diving boards with hockey nets
-80 degrees outside
* Polar bears abandon Baffin Island
* Girl Scouts in Minnesota begin selling cookies door to door
-90 degrees outside
* Wisconsinites migrate to Minnesota thinking it MUST be warmer
-100 degrees outside
* Santa Claus abandons North Pole
* Minnesotans pull down earflaps
-173 degrees outside
* Ethyl alcohol freezes
* The University of Minnesota closes
-452 degrees outside
* Helium becomes a liquid
-456 degrees outside
* Illinois drivers drop below 85 MPH on I-90
-460 (Absolute Zero) degrees outside
* All atomic motion ceases
* Minnesotans start saying, “Cold enough for yuh?”
Yes Todd, we live here by choice (MN)! Just a thought–it felt warmer today when we went into town –and that was about 15 below. 🙂