Top 10 Ways to Know When it’s Cold

10. It’s so cold… the hot fudge freezes before it hits the ice cream

9. It’s so cold… Canada geese are all saying “Hey hoser, it’s cold… eh?”

8. It’s so cold… we’re leaving the fridge door open to warm up the house

7. It’s so cold… my trick knee just bought stock in wool futures

6. It’s so cold… the family Suburban told us to take a hike…

5. It’s so cold… Sven from North Dakota zipped up his camo hoodie halfway

4. It’s so cold… the penguins are wearing Sorels

3. It’s so cold… the local well digger just quit his job

2. It’s so cold… chinchilla shorts for the whole family

1. It’s so cold… brass monkeys are begging to come inside

~ Submitted by Jim ‘Gollum’ Cessna

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