Top 10 ways to know you picked an ugly Christmas Tree

1. Your kids ask, “When do we get to decorate the ugly thing in the corner?”

2. The only place in the house that hides all the bald spots is the closet.

3. Someone puts a sign on the tree. This wasn’t hit with an ugly stick…It IS the ugly stick.

4. Even your cat won’t go near it.

5. Not even Charlie Brown would have picked it.

6. The only way you can get the ornaments to stay on it is to nail them to the trunk.

7. Friends ask you where you found your tree and they really mean FOUND.

8. OSHA fines you for creating an unsafe work environment for Santa.

9. Linus might have said, “It’s not a bad little tree…all it needs is a little napalm.”

10. The guy at the Christmas tree lot says, “Yeah, you want me to tie it to your roof or do you just want to drag it home?”