skip to Main Content

Signup for the "Familyman Weekly"

Sign up Now!

Fifty Years From Now – Andy Denton

The very first time I heard this song on the radio I knew it was important. I was so impacted by the words that I quickly scrambled to write down the song name and artist. All I could find was a scrap 12 inch piece of a 2X4. I scribbled the information down on it and TEN years later it still sits near my desk.

Dad, if you ever for a moment entertain the idea of “starting-over” listen to the message of this song.

So…get quiet and hit play.

*PS – One of you creative types should turn this into a music video. Consider yourself challenged!*

This Post Has 24 Comments

  1. Over the past 17 months there were several times when I just wanted to chuck it all and get out from under the pain of being separated from my wife, but God was not about to let that happen. He alone is sovereign. He alone is faithful. He alone is able to heal broken hearts. I returned home three weeks ago today. We still have a lot of work to do, but being under the same roof again is nothing short of a miracle. Guys – DO NOT GIVE UP! God may take you through some very painful times, but that just proves His love for you (Hebrews 12). Instead of running away, run to Him. He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it. Count on it!

  2. You remain faithful to the commitment even when she is not. I remained faithful when he didn’t and it paid off big! The Lord wants you to look at you not her. Love her like Jesus Loves you! A crisis is a time to seek the face of God and die to yourself. i guarantee if you do this the Lord will do amazing things maybe not right away but he will. Take it one day at a time. I will be praying for you.

  3. KDS – I just want to encourage you. Sometimes there’s nothing else you can do except pray and continue to be faithful. That may sound trite, but as Steve B said God alone is “sovereign”. Continue to fight the good fight and rest in God. Do all that you can do and rely on God’s strength day by day.

  4. Thank you. We are at 18 years, and though there have been times when it would seem easier to chuck it all, we do see the beauty and love that will be “50 Years From Now”. God bless-

  5. My family & I just returned from celebrating my parents’ 40th anniversary. I should say “40th anniversary of their second marriages” because both of them were married young, had kids, and divorced by the time the kids were in grade school. What adds to the amazing-ness of this 40 year marriage is that they met in the spring, started dating that summer, and married in the fall of that same year, which would lead one to think the marriage wouldn’t have much chance of success. But by God’s grace they have seen the three kids from that blended family grow up, graduate, get married and have kids of their own (9 total grandkids). Unfortunately one of the three’s marriage didn’t last, but the other two are at 15 & 18 years now.

    With so much pulling at spouses in today’s world, whether it is separate careers, kids going three directions at the same time, and everything around you in the world saying, “it’s okay to spend time with someone else,” it is ALL a God thing that keeps a couple together over the long haul. I’ve seen it in my own family, where almost every aunt, uncle, cousin, on all sides of my blended, mixed-up family, are on 2nd or 3rd (or more) marriages. My parents had the same challenges over those 40 years that everyone else has had, but Christ has brought them through them all, and will continue to sustain them in the future. And what’s great is regardless of whether He was invited to the wedding or was at the center of the marriage from the beginning, He can come in NOW and make all things new! He can and will give the strength you need to keep the commitment to each other. And He can heal the brokenness & make you whole!

  6. KDS– Here’s some practical advice from James Dobson about the extremely difficult situation you are going through…

    You’ll have to copy and paste the link in your browser:

    PDF format:

    href=“http://www.mylivinghope.net/janda/articles/UploadFile/1213676409_HopeForCouplesInCrisis.pdf

    Web format:
    http://www.troubledwith.com/AbuseandAddiction/A000000560.cfm?topic=abuse%20and%20addiction%3A%20physical%20and%20verbal%20abuse

    You can also just google for “Hope for Couples in Crisis” to find it.

    I’ll be praying for you!
    —Barry

  7. Awesome song! It is worth the struggle, hurts, heartaches to keep it together. There are 3 rings in marriage : engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffer-ring. I am learning that God wants my love for Him to be so much above that for my wife. Then my love for my wife will flow properly out of that priority and she will be satisfied in my love toward her. The only alternative to divorce is to remain single or become a eunuch for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. (Matt. 19:12)

  8. KDS and SteveB,

    Hang in there. I fully understand where you are. God led me to this awesome prayer/poem. Please pass it on.

    I AM STANDING FOR THE HEALING OF MY MARRIAGE!… I will not give up, give in, give out or give over ‘til that healing takes place. I made a vow, I said the words, I gave the pledge, I gave a ring, I took a ring, I gave myself, I trusted GOD, and said the words, and meant the words… in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in good times and in bad…so I am standing NOW, and will not sit down, let down, slow down, calm down, fall down, look down or be down ‘til the breakdown is torn down!

    I refuse to put my eyes on outward circumstances, or listen to prophets of doom, or buy into what is trendy, worldly, popular, convenient, easy, quick, thrifty, or advantageous… nor will I settle for a cheap imitation of God’s real thing, nor will I seek to lower God’s standard, twist God’s will, rewrite God’s word, violate God’s covenant, or accept what God hates, namely divorce!

    In a world of filth, I will stay pure; surrounded by lies I will speak the truth; where hopelessness abounds, I will hope in God: where revenge is easier, I will bless instead of curse; and where the odds are stacked against me, I will trust in God’s faithfulness.

    I am a STANDER, and I will not acquiesce, compromise, quarrel or quit.. I have made the choice, set my face, entered the race, believed the Word, and trusted God for all the outcome.

    I will allow neither the reaction of my spouse, nor the urging of my friends, nor the advice of my loved ones, nor economic hardship, nor the prompting of the devil to make me let up, slow up, blow up, or give up ‘til my marriage is healed.
    -Author Unknown

    http://rejoiceministries.org/

    There is some good material and podcasts on that site. The couple that runs it were married 19 years, divorced for two years (he cheated) and then remarried and now they help others. I love the last phrase, it encourages me. Pass it on to your friends and have them change the words slightly to use it as a prayer and they can insert your name and your spouses name.

    KDS, Praise God that your back home!

  9. I don’t normally write on blogs. I’m a man of few words. I read this and knew I had to say something. Now that that’s out of the way, if you have ever considered a divorce I beg and implore you not to. I have seen enough pain, suffering and regret from divorce. Where I’m not in the situation myself (though far from perfect) I am watching MANY family around me with divorce problems. Divorce only leads to that more problems not less. Especially if you have kids. Divorce drives an even bigger wedge into a still established family. Even if you have a piece of paper saying that it is terminated. Once again I beg and implore you to reconsider. There are too many family out there suffering this horrible thing. Pray and let God be in control. In the words of another good song… Cry out to Jesus! (Third Day)

  10. I’ve been there (unfaithful) after 30 yrs. We are christians but I was tired of feeling disrespected and unloved so I turned to another. A choice I regreat till I die. I put all my thoughts on myself. Prasie God He got my attention. I prayed Psalm 51. I learned that in order for us to work through this I had to keep my eyes on Jesus and not on my mistakes or on hers. I ask God to LOVE HER THROUGH ME and help me do what was right in His sight. I had no control over her so whatever she chose to do was between Him and her. The one thing I could do was walk with Him daily. Guess what – He did another miracle. We are together and God has never been stronger in our lives than He is today. The bottom line – You live for God and He will take care of the rest.

  11. I wish I could agree with the basic premise of the song, but it’s not worth sticking it out because of the soccer games or dance recitals. While those make for great memories, it’s all about lordship. Who owns me? Jesus. Who is my provider? Jesus. What is my mission? Glorify Jesus in everything, including my marriage. This song could have been sung by an atheist, save for one line mentioning God briefly. If we can appreciate the song for the earthly, temporal joys it mentions, then great! But let’s not lose our focus. Whether we speak of marriage, career, or anything else in life, IT’S ALL ABOUT OUR LORD, JESUS CHRIST!! 2 Cor. 10:17

  12. We are at 52 and counting. How do we do it? Faith, hope and love.
    But the greatest of these is love. (NIV – 1 Cor 13:13) God has been so good to us! May he do the same for you.

  13. I have been married for nearly nineteen years. I have employed various ‘strategies’ to make our marriage work but there is only one that has ever worked consistently. Paul writes, ‘husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for her’. I am not that good at it but when I do it everything changes (for good). My wife does not know Jesus as her Lord and Saviour (yet) but every year of marriage has been a testimony to God’s grace. The song speaks of memories. However appealing a life well lived may be it is not enough for today, for the pain of ‘now’. I can only live one day at a time, trying to be faithful to Him that is faithful. I made a promise and I want to keep it. I love my wife, and sometimes I feel it. Love is a choice. I am guessing that Jesus didn’t ‘feel’ much like being beaten, crowned with thorns, mocked by the crowds, pierced with nails in hands and feet, and then hung to die. Me loving my wife has very little to do with her and everything to do with me. Yes, I love my wife because of who she is and everything she means to me, but mostly I love her because Jesus first loved me and gave Himself for me. Don’t get me wrong, the memories are amazing but I need to find grace for today and there is only one place I can find it.

  14. kds, pray and pray and pray again. I will say a prayer for you.
    stormie omartian has a good book on it. the power to change my marriage.

  15. Hi,
    could anybody inform me how to contact andy denton ?
    We are doing family ministries at Indonesia and use this song to Bless many family…
    We want to buy the copy right to sell it at Indonesia..
    please email me at : spektrumdigital@gmail.com
    Thank you..

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.