The Differences Between Women and Men

Names

If Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara.

If John, Brad, Tony and Daniel go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Bruno, Scrappy, Peanut-Head and Godzilla.

Eating Out
When the bill arrives, John, Brad, Tony and Daniel will each throw in $20, even though the total is only $34.25. None of them will have any smaller bills and none will admit they want change back.

When Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

Money
A man will pay $10 for a $5 item he needs.

A woman will pay $5 for a $10 item that she doesn’t need, because it’s on sale.

Bathrooms
A man has four items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.

The average number of items in a woman’s bathroom is 328. The average man would not be able to identify most of them.

Arguments
Women always have the last word in an argument. Anything a man adds after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Cats
Women love cats.

Men may say they love cats, but when women are not looking, will men kick cats.

Dressing Up
A woman will dress up when she goes shopping, empties the garbage, answers the phone, waters the plants, gets the mail and reads a book.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

Any questions?